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Thursday, June 30, 2011

Angelique Returns

You just can't keep a good witch down.  And by "good" I mean "usually bad, occasionally helpful," and by "down" I mean "dead."  Angelique has been killed and resurrected on Dark Shadows so many times that it's hard to keep score.  Here's a few scenes to help if indeed you are (or ever plan to):  



In 1795, after Barnabas has risen from the grave as a vampire and summarily strangled her, Angelique returns as a giant floating head to prevent Ben Stokes from staking his master.  She even considerately moves out of the way when Ben flees, though one would think he'd just blunder right through her, seeing as how she is transparent and all.



Not content with ruining the lives of Barnabas and his family, Angelique decides to destroy everyone he's ever met.  She appears at Vicki's witchcraft trial ...

 

... and delivers a fairly (and literally) damning testimony.



After napping for two centuries, Angelique returns with painted hair as Cassandra Blair Collins, the new wife of poor enchanted schmoe Roger just in time to begin scheming to turn Barnabas back into a vampire.



She soon makes her presence known, appearing to Barnabas as "Angelique classic" in a dream to let him know that this is her new theme; that is, a string of dreams will bring the vampire curse back to him.



  Drama queen that she is:  "And the dark and terrifying thing you will find there will turn your blood to ice!"


After a series of blunders, Cassandra is exorcised back to the Netherworld.  At this point it is up to her "brother," warlock Nicholas Blair, to resurrect her, pink butterfly dress and all.


At which point Cassandra resumes her reign of terror, and subsequently her reign of wearing lots and lots of chic lime green.



Unfortunately, nothing good lasts forever, and Nicholas punishes Cassandra by turning her into a vampire (and forcing her to wear filmy blue dresses for the rest of eternity).  Here she is, surprising Barnabas with her latest return.


"This is what Nicholas has made me."



Angelique proves to be more clever than Nicholas, and after immolating him and resuming her life as Cassandra (for one episode, anyway), she appears in Elizabeth Stoddard's room to resurrect a super petty curse that makes the mistress of Collinwood think of nothing but her own death.



"And then I came closer to you ... and closer ..."



Unable to escape her Master's detection, Cassandra ditched the dark hair and was banished back to 1795, where she pretended to be a hooker for Barnabas' benefit.


Barnabas, not amused by his ex-wife's hookerly machinations, saw to it that she was routinely torched.  But Angelique was resurrected from the flames of hell by a ceremony performed by Quentin Collins in the year 1897 and immediately set out to make Barnabas' life far less than pleasant.


Ever jealous, she immediately forced the latest contestant in the "I look just like Josette DuPres" contest to start whispering meaningful phrases about Widow's Hill. 
 

Proving that she's not all bad, Angelique stepped in when phoenix Laura Collins set out to take her children into the fire with her ...



 ... in one of Angelique's best returns ever.


Having given up her powers of witchcraft a la Samantha Stephens, both Barnabas and Angelique are surprised when she is forced to return to a life with the Collins family in contemporary (that is, 1969) Collinsport.


Finally, in the last of her grand returns (and the least sensical), Angelique returned to Barnabas' tomb on a night in 1840.  Finding it empty, she decided to change her name again, and became Valerie "Mrs. Barnabas" Collins.

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