Happy Third Anniversary, Shadows on the Wall!

 In honor of the 3rd anniversary of Shadows on the Wall, here are quotes provided from the 1998 Dark Shadows calendar, issued by the Dark Shadows official fan club.  According to the calendar, "[M]any lines written in Dark Shadows scripts were never actually spoken during the show, after script editing, or because of time limitations.  Each date on the 1998 calendar includes a line from a script which was never heard when the episode was televised on that date."  Enjoy!

"A gothic world swirling with love, fear, hate, revenge, and the relentless mystery of the unknown, the world of Dark Shadows."  (6/27/66)

CAROLYN:  Your first and last breakfast in Collins House.  I'm going to miss you, Vicki. (7/1/66)

BURKE (to Roger):  Look, if I really wanted information about you, take my word for it, I'd have been a good deal more devious.  (7/13/66)

CAROLYN:  This place is like a surprise party, Vicki.  You never know what's going to happen.  (8/2/66)

ROGER (to David):  Oh, you mean no arsenic in the soup or bombs in the basement?  (8/15/66)

ROGER (to Liz):  I never quite realized how hard it must have been for you, bringing me up after Dad died.  (8/30/66)

VICKI (to Carolyn):  With a ghost prowling around the house, you still have to brush your hair? (9/6/66)

BURKE:  Why don't you go upstairs and beat your son?
ROGER:  David?  Why?  what's he done?  (9/26/66)

LIZ:  Even a gila monster is attractive, in a repulsive sort of way.  (10/11/66)

JOE (to Maggie):  Hey, do you remember that school play, when I wore that big black mustache?  (10/19/66)

DAVID:  Ghosts can't tell time, and they don't have calendars either.  (10/28/66)

LIZ:  Well, I believe you thought you saw a ghost.
VICKI:  I did.  I really did.  I didn't imagine it.  (12/20/66)

JOE:  Coffins opening by themselves ... bodies disappearing ... I feel like getting drunk.  (3/3/67)

DAVID:  Josette Collins' mother.  She was French, like Josette.  She stayed at the Court of the King of France is what I heard.  (4/13/67)

BARNABAS:  Ah, but I've been here many, many times, over many, many years.  (4/21/67)

ROGER (to Barnabas):  You seem to be a man who is very concerned with tracing out his roots.  (4/27/67)

BARNABAS (to "Josette"):  My father told you things about me that frightened you so much they drove you to your death, off Widow's Hill.  (5/25/67)

JASON:  I never saw Willie as anyone's servant.  Not in a million years.
BARNABAS:  I've been very satisfied with him.  (5/31/67)

CAROLYN:  She'd marry Jack the Ripper and I'd give her my blessings, because I just don't care.  (6/28/67)

JULIA (to Barnabas):  Wouldn't your existence be far easier if you didn't have to take the lives of others?  (8/7/67)

BARNABAS:  Oh, I assure you my friendship can only bring Victoria pleasure and ... fulfillment.  (8/9/67)

BARNABAS:  Dr. Hoffman, lift one finger to help plan that wedding and I shall strangle you!  (8/22/67)

BARNABAS:  I am of an era when women were much admired and respected by men, but were nevertheless subservient to them.  (8/28/67)

DAVID:  During the night, that's when he goes after people!  He gets out of his coffin ... (9/25/67)

JULIA:  I'm not the type to "break down."  (10/17/67)

BARNABAS:  My interest is confined solely to Dr. Hoffman and what she can do well and efficiently.  (10/23/67)

CAROLYN:  Now just settle down and don't let your emotions run away with you, Dr. Hoffman.  (11/3/67)

VICKI:  At this point in my life I don't think anything would surprise me.  (11/24/67)

ANGELIQUE:  Sarah reminds me of someone, a little sister I left back in Martinique.  (11/28/67)

NAOMI:  If the devil had sent Miss Winters, he would have dressed her more correctly.  (12/12/67)

BARNABAS:  I'm not going to be anyone's victim now.  (12/26/67)

ANGELIQUE:  I promise never to harm anyone.
BARNABAS:  Your promise means nothing to me.  (1/15/68)

JOSHUA (to Naomi):  You didn't think it possible that he could marry that baggage, but he did.  (1/16/68)

BARNABAS:  Give me to the waiting arms of the sleeping dead.  (1/30/68)

JOSETTE:  Why am I doing this?  What was the dream really about?  Why is it so cold?  (1/31/68)

JOSHUA (to Ben):  I could have you drawn and quartered if I wanted to.  (3/8/68)

STOKES (to Barnabas):  Now I have made a study of nervous males in your general age range.  (4/19/68)

BARNABAS:  I've destroyed, Julia.  I don't want to be an instrument of destruction.  (4/26/68)

CASSANDRA:  Remind me never to retain you as an attorney, Mr. Peterson.  (5/9/68)

STOKES (to Julia):  Now, Doctor, you surely realize that Barnabas Collins is not the perfect example of twentieth-century man.  (6/4/68)

JULIA (to Barnabas):  You always make me feel as if I were some sort of freak for caring for you at all.  (6/24/68)

BARNABAS:  The day I met Angelique was so many years ago, yet I still remember the sun, and her eyes.  They seemed so innocent then.  (6/26/68)

NICHOLAS:  I've always had a theory that, despite the legends, women are not ideally suited for witchcraft.  (7/4/68)

NICHOLAS (to Cassandra):  One more schoolgirlish reaction and well, I don't think it's necessary for me to threaten you, is it, my dear?  (7/10/68)

JULIA:  It isn't like Angelique, or Cassandra, to make such an enormous mistake! (7/12/68)

CASSANDRA (to Roger):  When you go by Nicholas' room, would you tell him I'd like to go riding tomorrow?  (7/26/68)

ROGER:  I do not understand your behavior.
CASSANDRA:  Be thankful you don't.  (7/29/68)

BARNABAS (to Cassandra):  Why do you want me to die again?  You killed me once.  That brought you no peace.  (7/30/68)

JULIA:  But the portrait has crumbled to bits.  We know there's some relationship between the painting and Cassandra.  (8/1/68)

WILLIE:  I found this dead bird in the woods and I wanted to bury it.  I can't stand the sight of dead things.  (8/20/68)

JULIA:  I examined her thoroughly before I pronounced her dead.  (10/4/68)

VICKI (reads):  Oscar Collins was one of the first magnates to see the commercial possibilities in the new invention, the airplane.  (10/18/68)

DAVID:  There was a Quentin Collins!  Look here!  Here's a picture of him as a baby!  (12/5/68)

JOE:  He's out there somewhere -- lying in the bushes -- waiting for me!  (1/1/69)

BARNABAS:  An animal who wears clothes.
JULIA:  I don't understand that.  (1/23/69)

JULIA:  Ghosts don't commit murder.
BARNABAS:  Are you sure, Julia?  (2/10/69)

ROGER:  Legend has it that possessed children are extremely restless.  (2/25/69)

QUENTIN:  How fortunate that your visit coincided with the latest Collins' farce.  Direct from Broadway, "Find the Will" - a comedy.  (3/12/69)

BARNABAS:  You ask too many questions.
MAGDA:  An occupational hazard.  (3/19/69)

BARNABAS (to Angelique):  I am hardly egotistical enough to assume my presence automatically means yours.  (3/26/69)

ANGELIQUE:  I shall arrive here as an heiress from Martinique and we shall be married in the manner we deserved the first time.  (3/31/69)

QUENTIN:  Even when I'm dead, I seem to cause trouble.  (4/8/69)

LAURA:  If you were imploring your own dark deities to help get rid of me, you can forget it!  (4/15/69)

QUENTIN (to Laura):  In Alexandra, it hurt me to send you screaming into the flames.  But tonight it doesn't hurt a bit.  (4/23/69)

QUENTIN:  I want to know who are the people whose destiny is involved with mine?  (6/3/69)

ANGELIQUE:  But I gave you eternal life, Barnabas.  You would be dust in your coffin by now.
BARNABAS:  Don't you think I might prefer that?  (6/19/69)

BARNABAS:  I'm sick and tired of being the object of everyone's suspicions.  (6/21/69)

BARNABAS:  You are toying with their minds, sir, their lives.
PETOFI:  You and I have something in common, then, don't we?  (8/8/69)

ANGELIQUE:  Stay away from me - I command you!
PETOFI:  Command all you wish, my dear!  The hand obeys Petofi - no one else!  (9/1/69)

JULIA:  Thank goodness I remember reading this is what they did before hypodermic needles were invented.  (9/11/69)

JULIA (to Barnabas):  This is not the first time you've seen some woman and thought her Josette.  (9/19/69)

ARISTEDE:  Never mind the mansion, Miss Witch, I won't be in this time long enough to need it!  (10/21/69)

BARNABAS:  I became the last surviving member of the English branch of the family two years ago.  (10/24/69)

PETOFI:  Can't!  I hate the word.  I prefer can and will!  I will go to the future, and I will go now!  (11/12/69)

JULIA:  I tried to contact the spirit of Quentin Collins in a seance.
BARNABAS:  You have been busy, haven't you.  (12/8/69)

QUENTIN:  It's bad enough having amnesia without someone hinting that I'm some sort of supernatural bizarrity.

MR. BEST (to Quentin):  I am probably the only one still walking who is older than you.  (1/20/70)

QUENTIN:  I have reversed the procedure - from ghost to man in ten not so easy steps.  (2/2/70)

CAROLYN:  Jeb assured me that Bruno just had a strange personality problem.  (2/27/70)

BARNABAS:  Surely you can give me a stronger injection.
JULIA:  We are not going to take a chance on your aging.  (3/4/70)

BARNABAS:  Never before have I been so completely a creature of the night.  But I won't give in!  (3/24/70)

NICHOLAS:  Angelique, when I look at you, it is inconceivable to me what bad luck you've had with men.  (3/25/70)

BRUNO:  No one "resembles" Angelique.  There was only one.  There'll never be another.  (4/6/70)

QUENTIN:  I never thought I had any choice but to be human, Alexis, and I certainly would like my life to be more - normal.  (4/29/70)

BARNABAS:  Nothing must disturb the sleep or sully the name of the other Barnabas Collins who died in this time.  (5/12/70)

LIZ:  From South America?  We know the original Barnabas' son had emigrated there.  (5/18/70)

 

ANGELIQUE (looking at Roxanne):  She's very beautiful.

STOKES:  Someone young and vital, that's what I needed.  (6/8/70)

LIZ:  I suppose any one of us would go a little mad if a husband killed himself.  (7/3/70)

ROGER:  Speaking of the dead has always been a disturbing thing to me.  (7/8/70)

QUENTIN:  Barnabas, how did you get behind those drapes!  (7/17/70)

BARNABAS:  Carolyn, who would want to murder anyone who came to Collinwood?  (7/23/70)

JULIA:  I know that something is happening in this house ... something unnatural.  (8/27/70)

BARNABAS:  What a fool I was, out searching the woods, with the vampire in her room.  (9/15/70)

WILLIE:  What kind of kookaboo talk is that!  I ain't gonna listen to you anymore!

BEN (to Julia):  I need sizes for your clothing.  Write them down, please.  I ain't got no head for remembering.

DESMOND:  Don't be ridiculous!  It isn't alive!  I'm not even sure it was ever a human head ... (10/6/70)

QUENTIN:  How would a mindless body know the head was there?  (10/20/70)

BARNABAS:  I sometimes wonder what my life would have been like if I had spurned my Josette and chosen Angelique!  (10/22/70)

BARNABAS:  The body is searching for its head, and may the good Lord help whoever has it.  (10/26/70)

JULIA:  Get the surgical instruments ready and then prepare the wolf's blood!  (10/30/70)

VALERIE:  I am not to be trifled with, by you or anyone else!  You just remember that, Miss Collins!  (11/4/70)

JUDAH:  Look at me, Miranda!
MIRANDA:  No!  Make it stop!  I can't look at him!  (11/6/70)

SAMANTHA:  Lamar Trask is an idiot!  I'm surprised you even listened to him!  (11/11/70)

MORDECAI:  The warlock killed my herd!  (1/7/71)

DAPHNE:  People live and love and die here - but the house goes on - its mysteries and dark secrets constant.  (1/11/71)

QUENTIN:  Surely someone in the time since 1680 has tried to find out what this curse is.  (2/4/71)

FLORA:  The plague is a disease, Quentin, and it is not transmitted by ghosts.  (2/12/71)

MORGAN:  We do know whatever lies beyond the doors of that room is cruel beyond measure, and its anger has destroyed lives.  (2/26/71)

CATHERINE:  The time has come, Brutus.  Go find the peace that has been denied you.  (4/2/71)

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, SHADOWS ON THE WALL!!!